Sunday, 9 November 2014

Another fine mess of the year.



God this desk is a mess!


A computer screen, a lap top on top of a lap top - I guess that’s a laptop top – a printer, an empty t-pot, an empty cup of tea – I guess that’s a no-tea cup – my watch! (I wondered where that was), a cable to connect the laptop below the laptop to the screen behind the laptops…..

I think you begin to see the picture.

I don’t, because one of the laptops has a screen that doesn’t work, and the screen is connected to a computer UNDER the desk, that doesn’t have an Internet connection and I’m trying to Skype my daughter with the broken screen laptop, which does (have an internet connection).

Though I can’t see that either ‘cos it’s Wi-Fi and that’s invisible.

I think.

My glasses case is on the desk, but not the glasses ‘cos there on my head. There’s a pen – my favourite.

My cat’s head is on my keyboard, so he’s kinda on the desk too.

And he’s black.

There’s a tube map of London, not sure why and an appointment slip for a doctor’s visit on the 11th of January at 17.30 but I don’t know if that’s NEXT January or the one gone. The fact that it’s on the desk suggests…. I don’t know WHAT it suggests other than that this desk is a mess!

There is a pile of self recorded DVDs – unlabelled, so I have to play them to find out what’s on them. 

I think I was intending to label them, that’s why they are there.

There’s the wrapper from n orange, or was it a lemon? It will be on the blog soon.

Two checks, I must pay them in, an unopened packet of tissues with a picture of someone who shares a name with my daughter- whom I’m unable to Skype, but miss.

A pink pencil, a yellow marker and a silver usb key that I don’t recognise.

A pen that looks like a black cat – not to be confused with the real black cat that looks nothing like a pen.

A hand written note that says “flour, cumin seeds, tarragon, goat’s cheese, preserved lemon and something I can’t read that might turn out to be a key ingredient.

Incidentally – I read yesterday in a magazine that is NOT on the desk – it’s on the floor nearby – that a particular TV character is an ‘acquired taste, like cumin.’

That’s quite an interesting description, no?

Ok, what else?

An unopened print ink cartridge thingy – boring.

A drumstick  - undrummed but interesting.

A screwed up tissue with raisin attached – yuk!

Whose desk is this?! They are a pig!!!!

An empty cheque book- illustrative of either healthy financial activity or an equally empty bank account.

A plane timetable – I FOUND IT!!!!!!

Now I know what time to get to the airport to bring you home…

There’s a necklace – that’s not mine….

Another hand written list – ‘Bouillon, cat food, tuna, sweet corn, anchovies, butter, Perrier and eggs’ – I’m NOT eating that ok?

Another orange wrapper – I have a collection.

Two unwritten postcards, they might have to do for Christmas at this rate….

An empty tin of olives, washed, with a question mark shaped piece of dried grass – just to remind me.

A note pad – with notes.

One says ‘stay of execution’.

I don’t know……

A book called ‘writers block’.

It’s in the shape of a bloc, nice.

But who needs it?


Not when you have a desk, and your desk is a mess.

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