Tuesday 15 November 2011


I’m pretty sure, though it never happens to me, that someone, somewhere, turns to someone else (probably in the same place) and says – “how do you come up with ideas about what to write on your blog?”

With me it’s just – “WHY do you bother?”

But, if someone is interested in the HOW, then the answer is – Mrs Melissa Smith.

Mrs Melissa smith is not exactly a muse, but for the blogger or blogerette trying to finish the day’s e-mails, cook dinner, write a report and come up with a pertinent post for the morrow she is a godsend.

Though how god got to pay the postage I’m not sure.

Probably sent the son.

Mrs Melissa Smith wrote to me only yesterday – she’s a real doll! Here is what she said.

Hello, (nice informal tone)

Compliment of the day to you, (that’s nice eh?) I am Mrs. Melissa Smith a Widow, British Citizen based in Moscow, Russia. (Though your English isn’t really up to citizen standard is it?)

I was recently diagnosed of having (see?) Terminal Cancer with only weeks to live, i hereby bequeath to you my 20 Million Pounds to set up a Charity Organization to help people in need. (cool – I may not be the most worthy, but I AM in need and I can see how to spend 10 million right of the bat)

Please respond so i can have my Lawyer/Solicitor contact you with further details to receive this inheritance.

Yours Sincerely.
Mrs. Melissa Smith.
Moscow, Russia. (nice formal finish)

I don't have a lawyer at the moment so i sent her the phone number of that man who keeps ringing me up at tea time trying to sell me double glazing.


Anne Hodgson said...

Well, it's quite an offer you can't refuse. - Have you seen this priceless jewel:
My Dear,
I am sorry for bouncing into your privacy. You might not know the sender of this mail. But i got your E-mail when searching files on reputable people online. Let me start by introducing myself. Here writes, Mrs. Amanda Jane Bishop (Phd.Msc,Fsd). I was married to Engineer Welshman Bishop an Englishman who is dead. When my late husband w...as alive he deposited the sum of £5,300,000.00 GBP (Five Million Three Hundred Thousand Great Britain Pounds Sterling ) which were derived from his vast estates and investment in capital market with a security company here in Europe., Presently, this money is still with the online bank.

My Doctors told me that I have limited days to live due to the cancerous problems I am suffering from at the moment. I have decided to donate this fund to you and entitled to keep 7.3% of the funds and I want you to use this gift which comes from my Husband effort to fund the upkeeps of widows, widowers, orphans, destitute, the down-trodden, physically challenged children, barren-women and persons who prove to be genuinely handicapped financially.

As soon as I receive your reply I shall give you the contact of the online bank in Europe. I will also issue you a Letter of Authority and give you the Last Will of Testament that will empower you as the original beneficiary of this fund. My happiness is that I lived a life worthy of emulation. Please always be prayerful all
through your life. Please assure me that you will act just as I have stated herein.

Hope to hear from you soon and God bless you and members of your family. You are to contact me with my most private email address: amandajaneb26@yahoo.co.uk
Madam Amanda Jane
Found through Patrick Jackson. Engineer Welshman Bishop an Englishman was genuinely handicapped identity-wise.

popps said...

Do u think there's a market for a coffee table collection?

Anne Hodgson said...

Well, for a blog perhaps. Want to open a new one?

Anne Hodgson said...

Ha! I found two German ones: http://www.spamblog.de/
Any in English?

popps said...

i don't know

but i was thinking of answering this one which came today- what do you think?

"Hey hey. I live in the same city as you. I am lovely and wonderful.
http://migre.me/64SRl See my photos."

Vicki said...

I think you should forward it to Melissa. It looks like she might appreciate a lovely and wonderful new friend.

popps said...

I was saving it for the next Cold Caller i get.