Not Much of Ever.

What exactly do you mean?

It’s difficult…. It’s as much a feeling as anything concrete that I can articulate.

Have a go!

Well, I’m looking at this young man, he’s there in the centre of the square.

Yes, you said, the sun is shining.

It is , it’s winter but the sky is blue and the sun is strong.

A symbol of hope?

Hope isn’t the emotion that resonates, he’s excited, very optimistic and therein lies part of the problem.

Problem, there’s a problem? Sun, blue sky….

There’s a woman.

Ah!

She’s standing next to him.

That’s good surely?

Yes, clearly the source of the excitement… but I want to shake him.

Why?

I want him to know how important this moment is. And the one just before and the ones yet to come.

Don’t you think he knows this?

No, he is in the moment, I’m outside of it.

What does that mean?

I think it means that only I can see the …. I’m struggling for the word, I can feel it but I can’t name it.

Importance?

No, it’s so much more than that and it’s temporal too.

How come?

Time is so much a part of it…. Maybe it’s that thing someone said about as you are waiting for life, life passes by.

Ok.

And I want to tell him to look up and seize it.

But he is isn’t he?

Yes, but unconsciously, I mean look how beautiful she is, they are……

Surely he knows this?

No, he feels something, he doesn’t see it.

There has to be a word for this.

YES! That’s what I’m trying to find, I think it ends in ‘ient’. If it doesn’t, it should.

Conscient?

Is that a word?

No idea.

I think it should have some element of savoir in it.

Savient?

Again, does that exist?

No idea, but it’s still not right. Sentient, does that exist?

Let’s look it up.

Able to feel or perceive things.

That’s it then?

Almost, but I want it to have also the ability to zoom in and out of time. 

Over time.

Wisdom?

No. yes. Sort of.

Hmm.

Maybe all this is impossible but I wish it wasn’t. I would need a time machine.

Or the ability to dis-locate.

In time.

And thought.

And to re-assemble.

Sentient doesn’t cover all of that, or at least I don’t think it does.

No it doesn’t… much of nothing ever does.