Sea Breeze.

the other view

I need some help.

I’m in bed, well on the bed – anyways I’m not up.

It’s not ANY bed – it’s a special bed, it’s outside, it’s inside and open to the day that looks special.

It’s a late-September-Indian-summer-gently –blue.

There is a breeze – I can feel it on my ankles, hear it in the trees, feel it on my face and skin. This breeze could be coming from the sea, it’s that soft.

I can smell coffee, yet there is none nearby nor anyone around to make any.

It’s in my imagination too – an imagination that sees me leaving the bed, going to the house, making coffee and coming back.

In this thought there is fresh bread and apricot jam too, maybe butter on the bread.

Yes.

Butter on the bread.

I have an open book next to me on the bed; I have reached the start of chapter 11. I have read over half of this book in the last month and a bit, it’s a good book and I have read two or three chapters today.

I cannot say ‘morning’ as I have no idea of the time.

I have breakfasted, I have read, I have written, I have slept; I have woken and read again.

No one is going to ask me to leave this bed; no one is going to need me to. No one knows I am here, probably no one cares and maybe only one person even suspects that it is true.

No one coming to look for me would find me as the only ones who know where to look are not coming today, that was decided some time ago.

The only slight change to this pattern is a note left under my door yesterday evening informing me that at 5 this afternoon the village has an ‘event’ that includes testing sweet cakes and playing or listening to music.

Difficult to describe.

The village, or a part of it, never see me and have kindly included me in their plan that will neither need me, miss me or be greatly improved or impaired if I am there.

It’s sweet.

But I am so alone I may feel lonely if I go  - whereas not knowing I had an option allowed me to enjoy being alone without feeling lonely.

I don’t want to feel lonely.

Alone I can handle.

Still, I need your help.

I can lean over at look at the time – the time I don’t need to know. I can leave this bed and go and make a coffee and come back. I can stay here all day.

Or I can leave this bed, make or not the coffee, and remain there, elsewhere – maybe I would do some stretches, go for a cycle or a run.

So.

What would you do?

  int/75